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Tuesday, March 16, 2010

How BoLS Didn't Get its Game Back

Sweet merciful crap! BoLS, take a look at your user comments and adapt. You always praise Privateer Press for listening to their target market- maybe you should do the same. I know that half of your deal now is to make controversial posts that drive user comments which in turn drives your ad revenue, but come the fuck on. By having contributors like Robin fucking Reece you are setting the hobby back years and are going to start losing readers. Maybe you should change your operating model back to giving useful advice.

I swear to god I didn't set out with the mission to rip on BoLS on a daily basis, but they make it so hard not to these days. Especially when they decide to bring Robin back for round 2 of his epic series on failing at life: "Winning with Eldar in 5th Edition Part 2" What's professor Reece have for us today? Mechanized Eldar- great that's hard to fuck up, load up on firedragons, fireprisms, and waveserpents and go to town. Well somehow he figured out how to do it though and gives us a list with 1 big ass firedragon squad, some howling banshees, striking scorpions (wtfuck man?), and a bunch of jetbikes. Well at least there are 3 fire prisms in there right. Check it out. It's incredibad.

So, his list writing is shit. Maybe his tactical advice is better. HA- it's not. Favorite quote:

The first thing to consider when making a list in 5th edition in my opinion
is always the same: how will I win games?

....and the first question I have for you is: how the fuck do you win games?

Well Robin, thanks for not explaining how the hell your firedragons are going to live long enough to take out heavy armor. Oh you couldn't explain it because they won't. Thanks for not explaining how this army can even deal with heavy armor- fireprisms and a lone firedragon squad are not the answer. If I were using this list and somebody plopped down a pair of land raiders, I would run to the hills. He also doesn't bother to explain how his unsupported jetbikes are going to make it through the game to hold an objective other than making sure you tank shock threats out of their way or hide them. He can't even explain the tactical decision that lead him to take 2 close combat aspect squads or how he intends to use them. All the real tactical advice he gives on that front is to use your prisms to pop transports (but wait didn't you say your prisms were going after heavy targets...oh no) and charge your aspect warriors in. Why bother doing that if you could stay out of harms way and shoot them?

There is a useful nugget of info buried in there about target saturation being a good thing. It is, unfortunately you don't have any. To succeed at target saturation you would really need to have more skimmers and more redundant units, by which I mean 3 smaller units of firedragons. As it stands now, he presents nothing but obvious, easy to deal with targets. Robin, do yourself a favor and learn some sound tactics and focus on your lists before you present yourself as a scholar of 40k. If you're going to present a fluff army, state that it is. Don't masquerade some clusterfuck of a list as a competetive entry, that is just embarassing.


Raptor1313 said...

You need a minimum of 2 fire dragons as Eldar just to get the job done.

Between articles like this [which, honestly,are generally devoid of useful information] and Disqus killing the load time, I don't really bother with BoLS.

I mean, Eldar don't have a ton of options, but you want as many grav tanks as you can load, and you want to avoid taking as much of their ineffectual infantry as you can.

John Laubersheimer said...

blech, that list is garbage. 11 meltas and 10 of them are in the same unit. Great. Where the hell is the rest of the antitank - a bike mounted autarch and some fireprisms? C'mon, I role with three prisms myself and I KNOW they can't be relied upon for that.

Granted the FD transport has spirit stones, but whoopdedoo. The goal when shooting at that transport is to stop it. Blowing it up is just a bonus. Hell, even if/when the fire dragons get out to ace a tank, good luck getting target number two.

PS: I know IG is a tough battle, but maybe id he actually acknowledged that they exist when he builds a list, he'd do better against them.

I think what it all comes down to is that the BoLS authors/contributors just plain don't see tank hordes on the table.

The_King_Elessar said...

Yay! Fucktard idiots writing shitty advice that makes people waste money and become shittier players! Man, that's my favourite flavour of douchebag.

Dethtron said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Ishamael said...

Honestly, I thought that the Mechdar list would be better, I really did. Played an 1850 game against an insane list (some 5/6 serpents and 3 prisms), and it was incredibly hard to take out any of those bright lances. Combine that with the speed and defensive capabilities of those tanks, and it just made my army fold.

His troops are trash with no endurance, he has a total of 3 anti-tank units (dragons, TL 10 1 crap, one other prism), and he still thinks that only when lists do well at GTs are they good. I find his claim of empiricism in that quite comical, as most people cannot get off of work, or are just broke-ass college students to get around the continental U.S. that way.

Dethtron said...

haha, i think i super pissed off bigred w/o intending to do so. oops. the bols comment sections and I just can't see to get it right this week. I try and be somewhat constructive and people jump down my throat. I wonder what they'd think if they read the shit I can't post there.

Damon said...

If you pissed off bigred then you definitely did something right.

Now I gotta go find out what you're talking about. THANKS for making me to BoLS ya bastage.

MagicJuggler said...

What I do not get is he gave his tanks TL Shuricannons and Catapults, rather than TL Lances+underslung cannons. Can you say dakkafail?

Also, Guided Falcons with Underslung Cannons and either the EML or Scatter Lasers are quite fun as dakka-dealers, and your best transport for your Farseer/Eldrad. So WHY TAKE 3 PRISMS?

Fucking hell.

Chumbalaya said...

So much fail, I couldn't care less if I offend them. If they post shit, they get it in return.

MorbidlyObeseMonkey said...

There is no unit of measurement for how little BoLS cares about this blog.

The_King_Elessar said...

I've continued, blithely, to post on their horseshit. Fun times.

Dethtron said...

@chunkymonkey- surely they at least give a picafuck. or maybe you're right, they don't seem to be listening to others these days.

Hoagy said...

BoLS - almost sounds like BALLS. Oh the irony!

The Lord of Excess said...

BoLS is only good for rumors ... beyond that I ignore all their stuff. I completely agree that most of their posts are there just to piss people off and drive their hits (so they can justify themselves to their sponsors). I personally feel that BoLS is the epitome of what is wrong with 40K. Way too much focus on tourney only play and on min-max cheese BS. I play to have fun and I enjoy painting, modeling and the fluff much more than I care about tourney play ... therefore BoLS at least to me isn't very interesting.