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Sunday, March 14, 2010

Dick Move UK

Cheers mates! In honor of me old cock sparrer Hoagy* and the fact that today's cack is coming from an article on the UK's 40k forums.com, today's dick move is going to be translated into British.

In an entry that is otherwise full of useful bits and bobs for newer gamers, some berk by the name of angelofblades brings some truly awful advice to us towards the end.

It's important to have roles for every unit in your army, do not fall under the threat of having all your units the capability of doing multiple things. The first problem with that is that it can lead to your units being very expensive. The second is that it often can't do it as effectively, as if you had designed another unit to perform that task to the maximum effectiveness. For example, do not mix an attack bike unit with 2 HB's and a MM, go full MM or full HB's. Or the more classic one is people who like to have close combat unit blow up tanks, like Assault Marines. Just because they can take a melta bomb, doesn't mean they have to. Leave the anti-armour to the units best suited to dealing with armour, and keep the close combat for infantry and/or MC's. Something like assault marines charging armour should always be a last recourse, when all other options have been exhausted.
You sir, are a complete bell-end**. Giving a unit the ability to tackle multiple tasks is the cat's pyjamas. Now over specializing will get you topped, but giving a unit the ability to handle multiple threats is a great thing. Your units should have the ability to deal with infantry as well as armour. This is why you should equip landspeeders with the MM/HF or Typhoon/MM combos. Just because a unit can take three meltas doesn't always mean it should. Is it going to see action on the front? Try dropping a melta for a single flamer. Now you can deal with those pesky ground pounders. Giving your units some versatility an duality will make sure that you always have something to do with them.
Sound of in the comments and let us know what you think of this ponce.

*A real Chutney Ferret if ever there was. I kid, he loves the top bollocks.

**So seriously how many slang terms for dick are there in the UK? Percy, cock, nob, meat and two, todger, maggot, willy, etc etc etc.


Chumbalaya said...

Must be something Freudian, all those dickonyms.

Also, horribad advice ftl. Duality and flexibility in every unit means you always have the option to go after any target with a reasonable chance of hurting it. Take IG Veterans for example. Load them up with 3 meltas and they can bust armor, stick them in a Chimera and now they have mobility/protection/tank shocking/LoS and movement blocking, give the Chimera a heavy flamer and they can hurt troops, add a multi-laser and they can threaten troops/light armor/MCs at range. All for 155 points. Take plenty and you've got a strong, versatile core to build your army around.

The_King_Elessar said...

Please never translate into British again. If you're desperate, my butler, Jeeves, (he's from the Colonies, would you believe) can perform the service for a small fee.

Dethtron said...

HAHA, I was just takin' the piss.

I blame the above insanity on a recent, severe British comedy binge....code free dvd player + amazon.co.uk = awesome

for the uninitiated, I would recommend the following:
The IT Crowd
Snuff box
Garth Merenghi's darkplace
THe Mighty Boosh

The_King_Elessar said...

Peep Show.
The original Office (perhaps not actually as good as your version, but still excellent)
Monty Python
Green Wing
Nathan Barley...

But you've made some brilliant choices there already, lol.

Darkplace spin-off 'Man to Man with Dean Lerner' was occasionally very funny, but not a patch on the original.