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" I probably won't read unless I'm bored as shit at work" - A. Hack

"I cannot bring myself to actually read this drivel"- anonymous

"pox riddled post coital stain of a blog"- anonymous

Friday, July 2, 2010

Friday Night Internet Fight Round 17 Results show

Damn, yet another lost fight for me. For you viewers at home keeping score I'm something like 0-5 right now. I guess you just can't compete with Chumbalaya and his animal sex appeal. I'll take home a small moral victory, however, as we hit 100 votes on the head this week, thanks to some new folks tuning in and calling me immature after Brent submitted the thread to YTTH, where Stelek posted a link back to the fight. Well done everybody, and as your reward I'm just going to give vote totals and not percentages- you'll have to figure those out for yourselves and if you can't, now might be a good time to contemplate not breathing anymore or at the very least only stepping into the gene-pool with water wings on.

As you no doubt have deduced by now, Chumbalaya carried the fight in his true east coast Cajun style with a whopping 36 votes. Your humble H., I mean author, came in tied for second with 16 votes each with "Everyone deserves a hug and a participation trophy- let's go sing Kumbaya." I'm sad to report that Not Brent crushed Brent 13-6. Wait a minute....if I add not Brent and count myself as among "Everyone" that changes my score to 16+13+16 = 45 meaning I defeated Chumbalaya. What, you mean he could add the same numbers in as well so still beats me by the same margin...fuck, I'll never win!

I'm frankly shocked by the fact that nobody voted for Zingbaby. You guys have been pretty consistent week over week for collecting a few votes for the biggest retard in the fight. All said and done, at the end of the day my only regret is that Pappy O'Daniel received no votes. Esoteric film references are esoteric.


k.Blas said...

Vindication for the not Brents!!!

Brent said...

I was watching the Not Brent totals rising slowly over the week...

...and I was pretty sure that it would backfire if I tried to whore myself out again for votes.


A blow has been struck against all right-thinking people everywhere...

Chumbalaya said...

I'm famous.

And good looking.

Muffin said...

I think the guy(s) voting for Zingbaby probably did it 'ironically'. By which I mean they did something stupid with the knowledge that it was stupid and felt clever about themselves.

Remember kids: knowledge that you're committing a crime doesn't make it acceptable.