" a piss ant blog" -Rikimaru


"Dethtron, you are...an asshole" - 38% of Dick Move Readers


" I probably won't read unless I'm bored as shit at work" - A. Hack



"I cannot bring myself to actually read this drivel"- anonymous

"pox riddled post coital stain of a blog"- anonymous



Friday, February 25, 2011

Friday Night Internet Fight: Round 52!!

FNIF 52- the revenge
guys drop your snowmobiling in here as you get the chance.  if you have time, drop by a few times to riff off of each other.  Make sure you use the appropriate color of text, because I’m just dropping the raw html into WordPress to make this feasible to edit.

thanks for playing.............my intro follows, be sure to snowmobile it as well

First off, happy first anniversary to the FNIF. One year of this shit? And we’re still reading it.  Speak for yourself - I gave up on this shit the first time you won.  I have it on good faith that most guys would dream of a three-way for their anniversary gift (not as easy as you’d think, really), so I’ve done you two better- a five way.  I’ve got Lauby, Brent, Kirby, and for the first time ever Tasty Taste So I guess I am just watching then? Hawt! ~no, you’re the last man in the centipede...  gathered here today to plow some internet bitches into the ground.  

Today’s post is a little bittersweet, since it involves the recent departure of Ron of FTW from the blogosphere.  Sadder still, I didn’t have to edit out too many comments that were actually related to the tribute post that Brent put up on BoLS.  Maddening though this may be, it’s also intensely hilarious to me because this is the kind of shit that could only happen to Brent.  That’s no joke - I was seriously proud of this article... I actually thought it might do big numbers with folks wishing ol’ Ron well, but instead we get the most needlessly contentious comment’s section any of my Bell articles have generated.  The fight will begin shortly, but first be sure to pay close attention to the color coded legend below otherwise this group snowmobiling love in is going to be confusing as shit. I kinda feel like the color coding is as close to a closing the barn doors after the cows have already escapes as any blogger’s gonna get.  Short of owning a diary farm.

dethtron
Brent
Lauby
Kirby
TastyTaste

After the first year of this series I should bloody well hope that you dicks understand that none of the names have been changed to protect the innocent (...should I start using an internet nickname now?), Probably, last time I googled for pics about you, all I got was a bunch of stuff about twinks but their avatars have been for my own amusement.  If you’re new here, welcome, and I’m sorry that somebody sent you a link of you being made fun of by a group of “adults” with nothing better to do than copy/paste somebody else’s fight and make fun of idiots like you.  Surprisingly little content was edited out of this comments thread, but I had to fuck about with the order of posts but plenty.  Snowmobiling shall be expertly applied like so much sex jelly by the guest columnists in the colors of the above legend- good luck trying to make sense of any of what is about to happen.  If you are still under the illusion that anything about life actually matters, make sure you vote in the poll at the bottom of the page to ensure that Kirby will never again win another round of FNIF! I completely endorse Kirby never winning anything!

frankio9- Primus inter pares Ack, Catholic Highschool Nightmares and Life of Brian sweet dreams

Myu- I came, me too in my eye still watching...
I saw,
I bathed the firsters with cleansing fire! Translate this into Latin or it doesn’t count

Kudos for the latin tho ~boodos for your English

Isaac- Correct me if i am wrong but does that mean "first through the flame"? my latin is a bit lacking. ~yeah, apparently.  Thanks for that revelation

ShiftAlmighty- how can you play space marines and not know that?!  This makes even less sense once something closer to an actual translation pops up.

*edit* .................... you play space marines like the rest of us, right? was this an attempt at wit?

steelmage99- It means; First among equals.
Was used to describe Ceasars role in the Roman Senate. Is that real historical knowledge or is that just wikipedia happy to see you? No, man.  steelmage99 is a bona fide historian.  He’s at least as smart as the high school gym teachers who always get suckered into teaching history.

nikephoros- I'm not sure they used that term to describe it. Julius Caesar was a dictator, and Augutus Caesar used princeps. If you have a primary citation for that, I'd like to see it. Brutus, c. 45 BC You would think someone using a Byzantine Emperor as a screen name would know better tisk tisk...

As far as I'm aware, the term was used first to denote the Pope's role in comparison to the other Patriachs of Christianity: Constantinople, Jersusalem (Jerusalem even!), Antioch, and Alexandria.  Cheboygan, Walla Walla, Atlantic City, etc.

ShiftAlmighty- look at Watson over here!

Hey pal i hear IBM is looking for you May his reign over us human cattle be violent and long  Sssh!  The Facebook might hear you!

demonetrigan- Post id tempus auctoritate omnibus praestiti, potestatis autem nihilo amplius habui quam ceteri, qui mihi quoque in magistratu conlegae fuerunt ~hey I’ve got some Latin for you:  FUCK YOU! Pardon your French. ~sucer mes testicules Kirby

That is taken from the "res gestae" Augustus' funerary inscription which roughly translates as "I was more highly esteemed but not more powerful than my contemporaries" And from that sentiment derives the idea of the "primus inter pares"
It was later used in the Roman Catholic church to refer to the special position the pope, as bishop of Rome held with regards to all the other bishops.

Hope that helped. I translated this as “I think I’m better than you.” I translated it as this was the first thing he found when he Google Old Latin. That’s why I turn safe search off.

nikephoros- So I was right. Thanks for backing me up, bud. Nikephoros, Demonetrigan - they’re out of control cops and they’re out for... STREET JUSTICE

Game Thug- Is that what you took from his post? Your reading comprehension needs some work.  FUCK YOU!  You’re insult comprehension needs some work.  This tired old bullshit?  This is the best rebuttal you could come up with?  You’re a human representation of everything that’s awful about abortion clinic medical waste.  Ya, Game Thug needs to reset; regardless of what anyone may think of the conversation, it ain’t lowbrow.  Reading comprehension isn’t an issue.

nikephoros- I was trying to be nice. ~why be nice when you can help make a pointless mockery of a serious tribute post.....Like this! ~when will you all understand that I am above the laws of mere mortal man? So you live in Kirby’s Dreamland, too? ~no, the crappy yarn one... Ouch. I have the original.  Stop it you two.  The original point was that the term "primes inter pares" was "used to describe Ceasars role in the Roman Senate."

When in fact, that term was NOT used. demonetrigan posted something from the res gestae, where the idea was expressed but that particular term was not used at all. So I was right, the term was NOT used to describe roman imperial power.

And he backed me up, incorrectly but close enough, that the term comes from a medieval religious basis and nothing to do with classical history.  The longer this goes on, the more I feel like history just got caught in a drive by.

So yes, he did back me up, even if it was unintentional. As you can see, my reading comprehension is perfectly fine.

GameThug- Your pedantic~god damn Family Guy- you’ll rue the..... shit nature is obvious; I don't know if I see that your reading comprehension is great. steelmage99 A fine and respected historian, that one is.  His seminal works: The Big Book of Vomitoriums is a classic.  said the phrase was used to describe Caesar's relationship with the Senate, and scholarship nearly universally uses this phrase to so describe it. So it "was" and "is" used as steelmage99 stated. Now, whether or not Augustus or his contemporaries used the phrase is certainly...not certain. But maybe you, Bill, and Ted could bring us a real live Roman to prove your point that "primus inter pares" was NOT used. Ever. Not even in reference to the Princeps Senatus.

But hey--in an internet full of blowhards, you can probably consider yourself "primus inter pares". You definitely stand out among people who claim to be right on thin evidence and misinterpretation of other people's points. Have to give props for Bill and Ted reference though according to historical records only Socrates was brought back by Rufus’s timemachine making him the only person close to the Roman Age.

Porky_Poster- Man, I'm going to miss From the Warp. Porky for the win!

ShiftAlmighty- who cares? more traffic for my favorite 40k site BOLS BABY WE NUMBA WON BIG TIME Switch to pink.

The_thin_man- Only a gamer could ruin a nice sentiment and a lovely gesture like yours with the compulsive need to be right. Only a gamer could feel real sorrow by the death of another Wargaming blog for christsake!  I felt mad sorrow - I’m a blogger I am.  To be honest though, I have no idea who this guy is referring to... but I can’t be bothered to check.

I think some of these guys wouldn't mind correcting someone at a eulogy.  That’s a pretty funny line, actually!

flummer- TL:DR ~so after months of not knowing what the hell this means I finally looked it up and now I realize that everyone IS lazy.  Also I know what Discworld is now.... first day with the Internet  I read this one and came close to typing DC:FO... as in, Don’t Care: Fuck Off.  

Porky_Poster- It's big of you to tell us - not everyone would admit that. Listen hear you goddamn son of a... wait...  Someone get this man a high five!  ~I feel weird having a FNIF in which nobody cracks wise about Porky’s mama or something  I’ll bite:  Porky’s mom has sooo many breasts... I can’t do it - I dig me some Porky Poster I do.  

Azureus-  The BoLS alliance: resembling a giant circle-jack a little more each day ~it’s cute that you’re upset that you aren’t going to be the one to eat the cracker at the end  I prefer the term, Mutual Masturbation myself.  I was actually okay with this dude.  He gave a concise reason for why he disliked the article.

Brent- Feeling left out? I've got plenty of hugs for you too. :) ~I’ve heard about your “hugs.”  And you’ll be hearing from my lawyer about that And how does that make you feel? As long as I can watch...  This is my only line from in the comments and this is the best you guys got?  At least Lauby didn’t chime in.

Azureus- No, because I'm not a pretentious wargames blogger.  I didn’t respond for a reason... ‘cause he’s right the fuck on with that one!  I let it go; he was looking for a fight.  As evidenced by Exhibit A...

Chris Coker- So...you're pretentious, but not a blogger, right? FTW!

Azureus- "Pretentious wargames blogger" was meant to be taken as one conjoined label.  How pretentious of you.

Chris Coker- That didn’t help...

Azureus- Well, I was trying to. (?) Allow me to clarify - I find the pedestal that some here put themselves on with these interviews to be hugely pretentious. I don't see how disliking that pretence automatically makes me pretentious.  This was his rationale?  Geez.  Let me say this with all the sincerity I can muster: so fucking what?  

I hope that "helps". Well it makes you sound like a dickwad who is looking down on what Ron and Brent do for the 40k blogging community. I mean, Brent is my muse and if I didn’t have my muse you wouldn’t have 3++. And then you wouldn’t have the awesomest blog ever. So get off your pedestal; there’s a group one over here! It is not about the community it is about me me me and Brent hasn’t done shit for me of late where is my fucking coffee Brent! and hugs...  Okay Tasty, way to screw up my compliment!  

nikephoros- Luckily for you, I'm pretentious and a wargames blogger. But I keep the two separate. Got to love honesty.

MarshalWilhelm- I wouldn't bother, dude.

There are a surprising number of commenters here who love to tear things down.  ~Viva la revolucion. I thought this was a thread about Latin. Project Mayhem will never die I thought Project Mayhem was applying to BoLS and then posting shit. The funny thing is, they do it anyway. *looks at Mercer and BBF* meltagun death? Beating tyranids when they make mistakes? Project Mayhem FTW! ~well the original project mayhem involved me applying to BoLS under the name Big Read, but several other things happened after that, like spamming “boner” on BoK

Which is quite safe to do when they are not under such scrutiny.

They don't change.  True.
They don't listen.  Right on.
They just undermine things.  He’s talking about me, right?

Just let them play with their shovels and picks (He said ‘pricks!’  Oh, wait...) and save yourself from getting dirty.

:)

Chris Coker- I normally like it dirty, but oh well...   More like Chris Choker.  Hiyo! Can I watch?  What are you doing with the video camera..?  ~capturing the double knuckle shuffle?  One of my finest moments!  Do you realize how long it took most folks to catch the dirty joke inside a joke?  Love that video!  

Azureus- "Tearing things down"? So you're happy with the number of really shoddy articles and weird self-loving interviews we've gotten lately? I am sure BoLS is happy with you continuing to contribute to their comment count  I thought this was a pretty good interview myself.

Seems like a situation worth tearing down. BoLS used to be better, and I'd like to see a return to those days. Can we define better again? I can define best: 3++ =D  Sellout.  

If you want to talk about my position with me please do - but don't just sit back idly "liking" every comment that goes against me and snidely putting me down to others. Direct your concerns at me so we can discuss them. That'd be a lot healthier for everyone, no? No indeed.  For once I agree with you.

MarshalWilhelm- I have reasoned with people that have your viewpoint previously. All it does is cause me heartache stop breaking his heart!  Stop commenting on this post.  For the love of god... think of MarshelWilhelms tender heart. and draws me in to something that won't be altered by just me. It is like a mire. I have decided to not post in response to certain people anymore. Better for me and though I don't think it is better for them, at least they are free from an argument-fest.

SPOILER ALERT:  Dumbledore dies at the end of this comment. JK Rowling is the worst writer ever. Ever. and and the Vampire Baby eats its way out of Bella’s vag! Don’t get me started!

Ask dear Porky, if you wish. His comments against things were far worse than yours. It wasn't the point that he was making that was the problem. It was that he would slander those who didn't conform to Romantic 40K and harangue people who showed dissent from that.

I cannot recall a single target who changed their view due to his posting at them.

Anytime someone stops using contractions in their comment its a good indication that they just got on the b train to self righteous psuedo-academic town. How far is it this town from pretentious turnpike again?  It’s just down the street from the Mensa Academy.  

Porky has much to offer the hobby. Bullying people into conforming to his view of how to play is not amongst that much.

We have chosen to focus on things that we have in common and has been going well so far.
:) That smiley face isn’t genuine! I am glad that to see couples therapy is working out for them.

If I like a comment that is 'against you' it is because it often repeats the message that I would share with you, coarse language or not, but saves me getting into a tit hehehe for tat set of posts. I am encouraged and encouraging those who are reasonable.

If I do anything 'snidely' it is to warn them from getting bogged down into something that is mostly fruitless. Why would I post to you 'it is not worth talking to you, Azureus, on this matter'?
The message is for the guy I post to. And you if you have an open heart.

But don't think I am talking to just you. It is the whole lot of half-empties that fills these comments sections.

If you think you will have a bad day, you are making it hard to being receptive to a good day. I am not talking on some airy-fairy Happy Happy Joy Joy thing. But a rainy paradigm is the reality that those with such glasses on see.

As to talking to you about things, well, I don't think that will happen.
If you have a problem with an article, how about telling Big Red, someone who can actually change something?
When you hit a hammer against a pin [engineering, not clothing] it makes a noise. If you don't use a big enough hammer, all you do is make noise. The pin doesn't move. Posting mean comments in the comments section is just like using that too small a hammer. Nothing happens, but noise.

Besides when I showed that your response to someone writing 'lrn 2 reed' after you wrote much the same thing to Kirby was hypocritical, Porky and someone else showed that your comment on another thing was inappropriate.
What did both Porky and I get for our troubles?
A "I'm the victim and you are persecuting me" post.  Speaking of victim statements...

What you did in the first place to Kirby was only equalled by the guy that wrote 'lrn 2 reed'. But you were offended by that and wanted yours to only be a joke but his was offensive?
People cannot speak to someone who is such an uneven judge of a situation.

So you are somewhat right. "That'd be a lot healthier for everyone, no!"

I am sorry if you feel I am being mean to you. It is not just you. Others could wear this cap too. ~well that was certainly long.  Anybody else read it?  Nope - I scrolled down.  You?  No, didn’t think so I stopped when it became obvious this was turning into an AA meeting. TL;DR  DC:FO

Azureus- Stunned you dragged that episode up again. I maintain my innocence in that - I made a joke, and the other guy didn't. Simples. The fact that you disagree doesn't belittle my skills of judgement at all, but nice try - ad hominem much? Yippie more Latin! ~Onay away!  uckfay!

I don't have a "rainy day attitude", quite the opposite and to suggest otherwise is slanderous technically, its libel since it’s been published in some form- I'm clearly optimistic that with a *minimum of effort* we could see some standards on BoLS, and I push in hope of seeing improvement. Yet you’ll likely never volunteer to do anything more than piss all over a comments section. Which is ironic considering what we are doing here... Ah, yes... but we aren’t claiming to be agents of positive change. Would this make more sense if it was entirely in pig latin? yabsolutel tno uyo lfoo!  Sshh!  I’m listening!  That's why I say the challenging things, even though I get endlessly flamed for saying it by boy scouts like yourself. Or maybe, you’re the flamer. Maybe. Sshh! I posit that you are the one with the pessimistic attitude, happy to accept the swill you're given in exchange for a quiet life and not complaining. What you're saying is pretty ridiculous if you look at it, but that's fine, because you've got a narrative and you're pedalling it. Good for you. I'm a pessimist because I believe and hope in improvement, and you're an optimist because you've accepted mediocrity. I'm a bad judge of situation because I make a delineation between an innocent joke and a directed assault, and you're a good judge of situation because when it suits you you'll ignore that delineation so as to further your agenda against your opponent. It's all very silly and I'm not buying any of it, so dump the "enlightened nice guy" bit because it's trash and you're every bit the troll you're trying so hard to make me out to be.

That is the last I have to say on the matter. Good day.  ...And with that he affixes his monocle, rolls up his copy of the London Times and courteously leaves. So you are saying he is Professor Layton? Is he still talking?  I thought that was pretty well-written, to be honest.  I dig it!  I like my criticism nice and grammatically correct... though there was a misplaced comma there.

Porky_Poster-  I can agree with a lot of that, of course, except the slander again, it’s libel and bullying. It's about making sure the prevailing views are at least challenged, and encouraging others to speak up too. Whether or not the views of the people directly involved change I don't know, but some of the hundreds or thousands (...think bigger!) of silent readers might see something new. I'd like Azureus to go about it differently, but I can't find fault with him challenging us. This is starting to feel more like the start to a bad porn or the plot of Threesome I am not really sure...

I_and_I- ~bum biddily bum biddily bum biddily bum...... PASS the Dutchie Mon I've never checked out FTW but I have seen some of your models and they are great and your logo is definitely the best (kirby ~the hell man.  Seriously can one FNIF go by without mentioning that a-hole. You invited me in you douchebag! ~funny, that’s not how I remember it...... Bumbaclot! Your wife does =D (is this okay? *concerned face*) Leave Dethron’s sister out of this! you get 2nd) so good luck with whatever you're up to next bro  ~him no bro mon.  Him wear dem punny printers!. Adios!

Kirby- 2nd :(. ~asshat! I know I should HAVE (hi BroLo) gotten 1st!  Are we done yet?


Friday, November 5, 2010

Friday Night Internet Fight: Round 36

 Shit, I don't know what is worse: the fact that the thread you're about to see "highlights" from exists or what a pain in the ballsack it was to try and edit anything remotely coherent out of this non-stop quote fest.  I apologize if some things in this just plain don't make sense, but it's not really my fault: deal with it.  Advanced apologies aside, I'd like to give Katie Drake a shoutout for sending me this one and participating in the fight as well.

Thursday, November 4, 2010

Up Yours Spambots!

Well, it's official- spambots are driving me batshit crazy.  Ever since I took the word verifications off of the comments section, I've been bombarded with spam comments.  They've mostly been on really old posts, but I'm sick of seeing e-mails from blogger about them.  This might not be relevant by the end of the week, with the transition to the new site, but for the time being Word Verification is here to stay.  So I'm sorry if you were interested in meeting local signals, getting a free iPad, learning the secrets of working from home, or buying prescription medications from Chechnya, but you'll have to do all of those things elsewhere.

Wednesday, November 3, 2010

Blood of Kittens Network

Blood of Kittens is now offering a social network-like/ mother of all webrings/ community pow wow/ whatever service.  In an effort to "save bloggers from blogger," Tasty Taste has set up a number of slick customizable templates and other fun things that you can use to spruce up your blog.  By joining you'll also get access to a host of useful (and ordinarily not cheap) editing features and plugins for FREE.  I've known this was coming down the pipe for a few weeks now and am pretty excited about the opportunity to continue to help build the community and attempt to unify things.  Dick Move will be moving over by the end of the weekend.  My account is live and ready to go, I just need to sit down and finalize things and port over all of my data.  Unless something goes horribly wrong, this shouldn't change the way you access Dick Move, other than that it should put me in touch with an even bigger audience.  So, you know, more chances that I'll piss somebody off who takes something I say too literally :)  I also understand that the transition should be pretty painless and things like links, blogrolls, and the like will transfer over seamlessly.  Links that you have to Dick Move should also re-direct automatically.  If this turns out to not be exactly correct, I'll se what I can do to fix it.

Expect more updates on this as I play around with the new format and get used to things, but I'm very excited to get access to Wordpress.  Their editing features just plain old blow blogger out of the water.  I've been using it for a while through Blood of Kittens for my FNIF: Extra Innings series and I've fallen in serious like with them.

I honestly can't provide too many more coherent details about this myself as social networking and the dizzying array of options offered in this project are largely over my head.  Sufficed to say, joining the network should only make things easier for you.  If you're interested in joining the BOK network or reading more from somebody who is not a bumbling idiot when software is the subject, check out Tasty's announcement over here.

For now the HoP will be remaining a separate entity, as we have our own URL and somewhat parallel, but not competing, goals for the site.  Lauby and I are looking forward to a continued great relationship with the new incarnation of BOK and will be looking into some collaboration, cross-promotion, reach-arounds, or whatever down the road.

Tuesday, November 2, 2010

FNIF: Round 34 Results Show

Looks like I forgot to put this one up over the weekend as I'd intended.  There's not a lot to say about this one other than that I'm disappointed.  Sure nobody actually won, but Kaiser Wilhelm came damn close with 39% of the 64 votes, losing by a hairs breadth to "screw the fight let's all have tea" (42%).  I was really hoping for a much larger margin of victory in favor of apathy on this one, as I thought everybody was kind of a jackass. 

Just goes to show that these things are hard to predict sometimes.  All said and done though, FNIF: Round 34 is among my favorites in recent history.  There was a lot of great shit happening there and just so much room for snowmobiling.  I think this might also be the best showing ever for "whoever wins, society loses," with 10% of the vote. 

Is there a moral in all of this?  If anything it is that Dick Move readers don't mind somebody who makes a good point and then craps all over their own thoughts.  Way to go guys.

Dick Move hits 100 Followers- Sporeginae for Everyone!


Hooray for momentous occasions. The impossible, finally appears to have happened- we've hit 100 followers.  Never mind the fact that Strictly Average is about to lap our readership, but fuck it.  Not Brent still wins forever.  Seriously though, thanks to everyone who's still reading this blog.  You're the reason I keep plugging away and dredging up all the shit I can find on forums, blogs, and the like.  We're not even a year into this site and I'm not feeling like giving it up yet, so keep those e-mails about dumb shit you fin coming- they help make my job possible.

Friday, October 29, 2010

Friday Night Internet Fight: Round 35

This week MagicJuggler was kind enough to e-mail me about a fight he was involved in over at 40kOnline.  Being the painful read that it was, I knew I had to use it for this week's FNIF.  The thread is called Tarrins Take What You Want (TTWYW) thread: 1K Sons and it will make your eyes want to crawl under a how shower for hours on end trying to wash of the foul stench of the raping they have received.  The highlight of this thread for me is that the OP is not only completely belligerent and ignorant, but also is blind to when people are contributing to his discussion productively.

Thursday, October 28, 2010

SWANS

This review should have been done weeks ago.  I was actually ready to write this at the end of September when the new record was released.  After all, it's not often that your favorite band ever that happened to have broken up in 1997 releases a new album for the first time in 15 years.  I've gotta say that usually this type of wait usually results in a huge let-down.  Bands often over-think things and wind up producing shit albums (see G 'n R).  So, it was with mixed feelings that I approached the release of SWANS new album, My Father Will Guide me Up a Rope to the Sky.  Expecting the worst, I was blown away by the record.  It's painfully loud, absolutely sublimely primal, and hauntingly beautiful all at the same time.  It's also not overly long.  The new album clocks in at just over 40 minutes, which is just about perfect.  Every song on it is a gem and there isn't any cheap filler material.

Wednesday, October 27, 2010

It's going to be one of those nights

Dr. Girlfriend just came home with a case of cheap beer and is blasting the dead milkmen.  Guess that means it's pumpkin carving time. 

Ps that big fucker clocked in @ over 50 pounds

-- Sent from my Palm Pre

Tuesday, October 26, 2010

Ch Ch Ch Ch Changes

I apologize for the title, but Ziggy Stardust was on Paladium last night, so I've got Bowie on the brain.  I've made a couple of updates to the page to hopefully make things easier to deal with.  I have disabled secret words for commenting.  We'll see how long that lasts, but I appear to have been avoiding spam for the most part for quite a while now. 

I have also, sadly, done away with post reactions.  They were adding a lot of clutter and weren't really being used too much anyway.  If you want them back, feel free to throw a shit fit, but it'll take some convincing for me to begin to care about what you think :p

Why all of these changes?  Meh, it's been a long time coming.  I've had a long week of coming to terms with some things- such as it turns out I might really like the upcoming Kanye West album... oh and that bipartisan politics are fucking up the country- and I just needed to spice things up a bit. 

So join me in one last sendoff for the boner city reaction.

Drumroll......brrzzzzzzzzzz: THE ROTOROOTER!

Over the past few months I've hinted in the most vague of possible ways that I have been working on a new IG list to highlight my Cadians.  I'd like to play test this a lot more, but time constraints being what they are, I'll go ahead and post what I've been working on so far- understanding that this is still going to be subject to a lot of play testing.  In order to dispel the myths that the Leafblower is the end all be all of IG lists, I've tried to create something that eschews a lot of the usual suspects that are most guard armies.  Specifically I wanted to avoid a few tournament stand-bys: the Hydra, Manticore, and Vendetta.  I'm not at all trying to play a fluffier than thou card or any shit like that because I still think the Leafblower is pretty unified in its fluff.  Neither am I trying to find a way to make Ogryn or Rough Riders viable.  I think that would be a completely fruitless effort.  Being the tread-head that I am, my list will still include a number of Chimerae and a shit load of other vehicles. 

Monday, October 25, 2010

The Blogging Oedipal Complex

In writing up the announcements for the House of Paincakes today (an honor which usually falls on Lauby's shoulders, but apparently he was too busy with things that he'll no doubt assure me are not in any way related to Fallout New Vegas) I realized something- its readership is about to surpass Dick Move and in record time, no less. 

Friday, October 22, 2010

Friday Night Internet Fight: Round 34

This week an article on Comp went up on BoLS.  Sometimes an article is so obviously going to result in a fight that I can't bring myself to use it.  Sometimes an article is so obviously going to result in a fight that I do have to use it.  This feel into the latter camp.

FNIF: Round 33 Results Show

For a while there during the first couple of days it was looking as though there might be a 4 way tie for winner amongst the participants.  That didn't last long though, as we all learned something and "Not going back to that Forum Any Time Soon" Pulled out way into the lead with 33 or the 64 total votes (51%).  If this thread was evidence of what business as usual looks like over there, that might be a safe policy. 

Amongst the fight participants, RedsandRoyals somehow managed to prove to be the least moronic of the lot with 12% of your votes. I am still shamed and astonished by this.  Trickstick and dedrier managed to pull some respectable numbers amongst the rest of the buffoons with 10% and 6% of the vote respectively. 

I think if nothing else, this fight has proven the value of having somebody in your forum who has at least read the rulebook all the way through and knows that GW publishes FAQs for all of their codices. 

Wednesday, October 20, 2010

Return of the Math!

It has been a while, but I think it's high time to resurrect the Dick Move Mathlete of the Week Program.  I just stumbled across Zheilt's blog Custodes and was pretty well blown away by what I found there.  It's a damn shame, but it looks like he's been at it for a little over a month now and doesn't have much of a following yet, in spite of some pretty good content- whore yourself out more.  Join the HoP, we'll get you some readers :)

Whoring of the blog network aside, Zheilt appears to have a pretty good grasp on stats and excel and has made some pretty easily readable charts, such as this one showing why melta lances are not really going to be the end of gaming as we know it.  He does similar things for several other topics, so take some time, poke around his site and make sure to follow it if you like what you see- I know I did.  Nice work Zheilt.  I'm looking forward to seeing more of your stuff.

Tuesday, October 19, 2010

Rock and Roll Diary- The EP is mastered and ready for print

Last night we wrapped on recording the Rise of the Templars Ep for Hoagy and my band, Crusader.  Unlike most of the days I've spent in the studio, I didn't snap any pics and upload them here.  We were basically just adding synths, mixing, and mastering the 4 tracks, so I can assure you that it wasn't so exciting.  No midget porn, strange donut frosting incidents, large body/regular sized guitar hijinks, or any of that- just 4 dudes sitting around a mixing board with my trusty MIDI controller in tow.  Trust me, as exciting as it was to hear the finished songs for the first time, it would only have ended in a "you had to be there" scenario. 

Other than being about 20 hours over budget, I have no real regrets about this recording session for the first time ever.  I think being a loud mouth jerk on the Internet has helped me to be more vocal about how I want things to sound.  It might be weird for a drummer to be so involved in the overall process, but I like what I do and I want that to come through in harmony with the rest of the band.  I've got to give it to the whole group, I think everyone was in top form. 

I was hoping to have more versions of 2 of the songs, showing how a track is built in the studio- from scratch tracks and demos all the way to the finished product.  Sadly, that would have eaten up a lot of expensive studio time that was already running very thin.  It's too bad, as I set out on this endeavor originall to let you all share in the experience of hearing something come together, but I guess it wasn't to be.  Regardless, I'll re-post the original scratch tracks for 2 songs that I've put up previously set against the final versions from last night.  That should give you some idea of what a little spit and polish will do to a track.  Enjoy.

Here is the scratch version of track number one (labled as #3 for some reason)- the title track "Rise of the Templars"



03 rise of the templars unmixed by dethtron


.....and here is the final version



01 Rise of the Templars by dethtron


Now for track number 3, Asgard's Fire, formerly known simply as the Viking song. I'm glad it finally found a name. This is the original scratch track



04 untitled unmixed viking shenaniga by dethtron


......and here is the final version. You may find that it ends a little abruptly, but it bleeds over into the next song, so it makes more sense in the context of the album.



03 Asgard's Fire by dethtron

That's it.  Enjoy these while they're up; I will be taking the tracks off of Soundcloud in a while, but all of this should be on disc and iTunes by early December.  Feel free to comment, but if it's about Hoagy's voice sounding nasal, I think you might be smoking crack.  I've got 4 other bandmates and a very experienced recording engineer that will all disagree with you.

FNIF: Extra Innings is up

I just wanted to update everyone quickly on a few things. Since I've had/am having a busy week.

  1. Finished mixing the Crusader sessions last night (only 15 hours over-budget, thanks to our recording engineer being very generous with a few things- should have been 20ish hours over in reality).  I'll post final versions of the first two songs I put up in the rock and roll diary series later tonight because...
  2. Have a managerial financing exam tonight- should be a joke, but am still compelled to study
  3. participated in some 40k this week for the first time in too long.  Got to thinking about the next "game breaking" IG list and think I'm getting close to revealing what will become my main tournament army
  4. getting 2 super special HoP posts ready to roll- one is a hobby article by me and the other is an interview with a well known gamer about his sweet ass army.  Those will be out over the next week and a bit.
  5. Went to a pumpkin patch and saw a civil war reenactment with Hoagy, Dr. Girlfriend, and Hoagy's fiance, son, and mother-in-law.  Good times were had by all and Uncle Dethtron taught Hoagy's spawn some bad habits- win!  There will probably be some pics up on Hoagy's When Cannons Fade shortly. 
  6. Last but not least, the newest installment of FNIF: Extra Innings is up on BoK in all of its ill formatted glory, check it out.  But seriously, if any of you word press users can figure out why the fuck it jams a bunch of shit that I had properly spaced together, I'd appreciate a heads up.

Friday, October 15, 2010

Friday Night Internet Fight: Round 33

There was a hard fought battle of the wits this morning as Dethtron fought Dethtron in a no-holds-barred steel cage death match to determine which of three absolutely ridiculous forum threads to use for this week's fight.  I think I figured out how to use one of them for my FNIF: Extra Innings series that no one reads, but ultimately I decided on going using one from a newer forum, Imperial Guard Message Board.  For some naive reason, when I found out this forum existed a while back I actually got a little excited.  Being a Guard player myself, I'm always on the lookout for some new info.  You don't have to be a rocket surgeon to figure out how this brief love affair ended:  I read a few posts and realized that not only is everyone there full of shit, but Melissia is a frequent poster...shit.

Wednesday, October 13, 2010

Why Comp Sucks: Inspiration Strikes

Today while doing my grocery shopping, I was struck quite unexpectedly with an image that got me to thinking about comp in gaming tournaments.  Somehow I've managed to run this blog since last winter and never really go off on one of the things that infuriates me most in the hobby.  Maybe others have beaten this dead horse into glue already, but I think I found a way to articulate what bothers me about comp: not that it drastically alters a game system, but that it is entirely counter-productive.  Now, I will preface this by saying that I do not intend to step on any toes culturally or offend anyone.  I know that sounds fucked up coming from me, but you'll see why in a minute. 

Rock and Roll Diary: Iron Forge

You can almost taste the maple shells and gold hardware- would you believe this kit's 14 years old?
I was planning on returning to writing about gaming today (I still might later), but Hoagy just sent me another test mix 12 minutes ago- I've now listened to the song 3 times, so that's how I know so specifically :). Apparently he finished up his vocal takes last night under the radar. 

Unlike the last "finished" song I posted, this sounds a lot more like the rest of our material.  "Engine face," previously posted, was written in the very early days of the group, so we're probably retiring it soon.  It's fun as shit to play, though, so we wanted to record it for fun and posterity's sake. It will not be making it onto the full length album, sadly.

Anyway, here is the test mix of "Iron Forge" including the controversial new chorus*.



Iron Forge by dethtron


======================================================
*for an early demo featuring the original chorus, check this shit out, recorded 6 bass players ago when we were a 4 piece with a different name....